Edward Lear was a cat loving, 19th century, British artist, poet and storyteller (The Owl & the Pussycat, anyone?) who lived the last 15 years of his life with a cat named Foss (survivng his going to Rainbow Bridge by only 4 months)...
While Lear didn't invent the poetic form known as the limerick, he took a shine to its possibilities.
According to the book EDWARD LEAR: The Complete Verse & Other Nonsense edited by Vivian Noakes, "Lear himself never used the word 'limerick'...he called them his 'Nonsenses' or 'Old Persons'." Upon being introduced to the form he realized "that he had discovered 'a form of verse lending itself to limitless variety for Rhymes and Pictures'."
During the first month of the life of this blog, Nikita, the original "Opinionated Pussycat", introduced readers, not just to limericks, but several other short forms ideal for what I am going to call, in honor of Mr. Lear and his beloved feline, Foss...Kitty Nonsense Poetry:
So, here's Learing at you, felinity assembled!
I, Elvira Mistress of Felinity, am about to get all nonsensical on you!
A light humorous, nonsensical, or bawdy verse of five anapestic lines usually with the rhyme scheme AABBA.
No catnip was consumed, or catnip toy played with, in the creation of this nonsense...
Daddy Kiril and Sneakers the Texian Tuxedo are my witnesses!
1. There once were two kitty's writing a blog
Whose efforts readers raised in toast their grog;
So they continue to write,
During the day and the night;
The urge in others to do it to they hope to jog.
2. There live two girl cats in Houston,
Reading their blog is great fun;
Their lone roommate is a he,
A human companion, you see;
Check out the two girl cats in Houston!
3. There was a young cat of Houston,
who thought eating string would be fun;
For her indigestion,
A vet visit was the suggestion;
Purr for the poor young cat of Houston!
4. There was a young cat of Houston,
Who felt sorely put upon;
His human thought it cute,
To dress him in a suit;
The embarrassed young cat of Houston!
5. There was a young cat of Spring,
Whose farts were well-known for smelling;
When asked if she ate carp,
She replied, "my, but you're sharp!"
That smelly young cat of Spring.
6. There was a young cat of Wallis,
Whose tail stuck out far from his ass;
Being stepped on he couldn't avoid,
Through all his life he showed impressive sangfroid;
The much put upon young cat of Wallis.
7. There was a young cat of Tomball,
The other cats food she liked to eat all;
Being fat wasn't sound,
She soon found;
The overweight young cat of Tomball.
8. There was a horny cat of Conroe,
"I'm in heat!" he loudly let the city know;
That not one lady cat cared a shit,
Gave the poor Tom a fit;
The sexually frustrated cat of Conroe.
9. There was a young cat of Uncertain,
Whose meowing caused heads to spin;
Her meows were so extreme,
No-one remembered hearing such a scream;
The outrageously loud cat of Uncertain.
10. There was a young cat of Bellaire,
Who climbed to the top of a very high chair;
There he intended to stay,
Unless fed tuna every day;
That spoiled young cat of Bellaire.
11. There was a young cat of Harris County,
Upon whose head was a large bounty;
That squirrels, birds and dogs he'd scare,
Was not thought very fair;
That trouble-making young cat of Harris County.