The Occupy Your Litter Box Movement Manifesto
Join the Occupy Your Litter Box Movement! (OYLB)
There is a feeling shared by a growing number of Felines in the homes of the world that the global effort to teach Cats to use the Human Toilet (It's their Litter Box Thingy) has become a kind of global scheme, run by, and for, the benefit of the 1 percent of Humans who don't want to clean up after their Kitties when we use the proper place for us to do our Duty...
We believe that it is possible to discourage this effort to train gullable Felines into "Going" against their nature. We have come up with the following list of things that can be done right now to stop this effort in its tracks:
• Remind Humans that elderly, and sick, Cats can't exactly go leaping on the Loo, and steadily balance themselves for the duration.
• Increase funding to animal services, for classes in training Humans in proper Litter Box Care.
• Forgive all Feline Bathroom Mishaps.
• Reinstate the Purr-Hiss Act of 1999 in order to end wild, & offensive, not to mention unfounded, speculation on why some Cats have Litter Box Issues
• Work with the other G20 nations to implement better dissimination of information to Humans about proper Litter Box Care worldwide.
• Ban high-frequency ‘flash’ freaking out at Bathroom Mistakes of Cats, by Humans, and bring sanity to the home.
• Break up the “too simple to fail” training courses, and instruction publishers, that threaten our future use of the Litter Box
• Arrest the fraudsters responsible for the 2008 psychological meltdown of Felines in San Francisco when the City Council came within 1 vote of banning the use of Litter Boxes in the home, and bring them to justice
• Ordain a Presidential Commission tasked with ending the influence corporate money has on those elected representatives in Washington who do not have the best interests of Felinity Assembled at heart.
If you agree with any of these demands, or just think this whole post is the funniest damn thing you have seen, or read, all day, week, month, or year, then share this link, on your blog, via Facebook, and Twitter, with your friends, and family, and even Dog, Ferret, and Bird lovers!
We have no delusions that President Obama, or Congress, will respond to each of these demands, or that they will be brought up in the Presidential Debates, now, or in 2012.
This is just some serious venting on our part in response to the idiocy that is the Occupy Wall St. Movement (OWS), and the Occupy Orange County nonsense going on in our own backyard (Has there even been any coverage of those Cats, Dogs, Ferrets, or Birds, that have been made to attend these "Occupations" by their Human Companions? SAT. MORNING UPDATE: Video shows that a Protestor encouraged Dog to attack Reporter).
There may be more such blog posts to come as we show our displeasure over the Leftist, Communist, Socialist, Anarchist, and assorted other Radicals, efforts to reshape America, and the world.
If you post photos of yourself (If you are a Cat who blogs), or of your Cat (If you are a Human who blogs about their Feline Companions) in the Litter Box, in solidarity with our cause, please leave a link in the comments, or send us an e-mail at the address in the sidebar. ;-D
— Patriot Nikita Cat & Patriot Elvira Mistress of Felinity
Felinity Assembled of Santa Ana, Ca.
Meowsings of an Opinionated Pussycat
LIST OF THOSE WHO HAVE JOINED THE CAUSE!!
George & Gracie, of Catanooga Choo Choo, just, um, Burns with the urge to do their Doody, in support of the Ameowican Way! ;-D
2. To quote the Kitties over at Katnip Lounge: "Now THIS is a subject we can really dig in to!
All the way to China, according to Mommy." (Love their Blog Header!)
3. CatCat of LyndaLand joined Oct. 29th!